I’ve tried giving up.  I’ve tried looking through basketball recruiting lists to cheer myself up.  I even have a “projecting the basketball lineup after McCamey/Legion/Davis/Tisdale leave” post typed up and nearly ready to go, but I can’t bring myself to post it yet.  It’s the middle of October.  We should be 3-2 with the worst of the season behind us and Florida on our minds.

But we’re not.  But we should be.  And I can’t get past it.

So, I’ll fix it.  The 5 things we can do to turn this season around, get on a little roll, and god bless it, travel to Detroit on December 26th to face Central Michigan.  Baby dry your eyes, save all the tears you’ve cried, ’cause that’s what dreams are made of.

1. All Gress, all the time.

He’s our best special teams player.  And he provided a nice spark in the second half on Saturday.  He’s a fiery, high motor guy on a defense full of sleepwalkers.  Sit Frierson, start Gress, and watch the magic happen.

Another benefit to this is that I think Ian Thomas plays a little smarter from the middle.  Let Aaron Gress handle the strong side (seriously, watching the second half at MSU again, he looked like 2007 Brit Miller out there), let Thomas take the middle, and leave Ellington weakside.  And in the nickel, drop Ellington and leave Gress out there.  He has to know the defense by now.  Start him and see what he can do.

2. Let Joe Gilbert go medieval on the offensive line.

I like what I read today about open competitions on the offensive line.  I say go crazy.  I was thinking about it last night and came up with this: What if you slid Asamoah over to Center, Block back to left guard, and gave Jack Cornell a shot at right guard?  I know Cornell’s been nicked up, but if he’s healthy, he needs a shot.  Asamoah could get all Ryan McDonald-y at center and play O-line quarterback, Block knows the assignments at left guard, and Cornell has to be ready to step in by now, yes?

I’ve thought of many other changes.  Give Tyler Sands a shot at center, moving Block over to left guard.  Give Craig Wilson a shot at LT with Jeff Allen sliding over to solidify the right side (I really think we could run effectively off the right side if our top two offensive linemen where lined up next to each other).  Pull Andrew Carter’s redshirt and toss him in at left guard.  Hell, give converted defensive lineman Anterio Jackson a few snaps at right guard and see what he’s got.

Point being, do something.  What we’ve got ain’t working.

3. Gamble on defense. Not Brian – I want our coordinator(s) to gamble on defense.

You know what I want to see?  First play from scrimmage against Indiana, 8 man blitz.  I don’t care if Indiana throws a screen and it goes for 41 yards.  Make the Indiana offensive coordinator up in the booth go “Um, what?? This is Disch and Mallory – they’re nothing if not predictable.  What the hell was that?” Then drop 8 in coverage on second down.  Then go dime on third down with Terry Hawthorn playing “watch the QB’s eyes and pick off the pass”.

Most of all I want to see the play call come in, followed by Donsay and Garrett looking at each other, asking “did you just see the same signal I saw?”, followed by a grin, followed by “let’s do this”, followed by a PBU.

4. For two is enough to fill our lives with love.

Mikel, you get the entire first quarter.  Jason, you get the entire second quarter.  Winner gets the whole second half.  Troy, Daniel, and Justin – sorry fellas, but we’re sticking with two running backs this game.  Show yourself in practice and you might get all the carries next week.  But for now, it’s a tailback cage match with the winner taking all of the second half carries.

We’re 5 games deep in the season, and not one running back has more than 30 carries. Somewhere, Robert Holcombe weeps (but his knees cheer!).  Sure, Zooker, I know you were all “hey, Rashard didn’t start getting all of the carries until the 6th game in 2007″ at this week’s press conference, but after 5 games that season, Rashard had 95 carries.  So stop bristling at the question and pick someone already. We need continuity.

Oh, and please pick My Man Mikel.  He good.

5. Let Juice be Juice be Juice be Juice.

Get stupid.  Throw out the playbook.  Game plan a few designed rollouts to the right side (with Cumberland, Benn, Fayson, and Jenkins on go-routes) and simply tell Juice to go make something happen.  Roll out and either flick your wrist and throw it 55 yards or tuck it and run someone over.

Tell him to have fun.  Design a QB draw on the first play and tell him his job is not a bunch of yards but to make a statement by delivering a hit to whomever attempts to tackle him.  Make a .gif of his hit on the Northwestern linebacker in 2007 and email it to him.

Most of all, sit down and tell him that interceptions aren’t the end of the world, so stop trying not to throw them.  Tell him that the exact same game plan from Indiana last year is in play again – throw deep to set up the run.  And then throw deep.  And then throw deep again. Make the motto for the rest of the season this: You only have to complete one 20 yard pass every 3 downs to keep the ball moving.

So there it is.  The path to a 5-2 finish.  Sorry Mom, Christmas dinner looks great, but I’ve got a flight to catch. I’m Detroit bound.